Hi Ms. Rica,
Medyo nakakahiya lang eh, pero I’m just curious po bakit minsan gusto ng lalaki ang anal sex? Kasi po pag nagsesexy time po kami ng asawa ko gusto niya daw po sa behind o puwet. Ayoko po ng ganun eh. Kasi po masakit. Saka po ano po ba ang difference ng feeling ng boys with anal sex versus vaginal sex?
Painful In the A
Hello Painful In the A,
Huwag kang magaalala, hindi kita jinujudge, kaya hindi mo kailangan mahiya sa pagsulat sa akin. Thank you for having the courage to write and ask about your situation. Though I am sorry that you’re not enjoying this part of sex with your husband. Para sa akin kasi, sex should be enjoyed by both partners. Mapa-vaginal sex, oral sex, o anal sex pa ‘yan.
In reality, madaming babae ang katulad mo na hindi gusto ang anal sex. Sa isang study, more than half of women who have experienced anal sex describe it as something unpleasant na hindi na nila uulitin. Maraming sa atin ang nasasaktan during anal sex because the anal region is not as elastic nor as lubricated as our vaginas, kaya kung hindi tayo sanay at walang extra lubrication ay puwede tayong masaktan.
In the same study that I mentioned above, kabaliktaran ang nararamdaman ng mga lalake pagdating sa anal sex. So, bakit kaya gustong gusto ng mga lalaki ang anal sex?
1) For sexual variety. Minsan, mas nakakaarouse sa mga lalaki ang iba’t ibang sexual experiences. At dahil hindi naman nila madalas na nararanasan ang anal sex, hinahanap-hanap nila ito.
2) As a gift from the woman.Para sa mga lalaki, kung willing na makipag anal sex sa kanila ang mga partner, iniiisip nila na ito ay isang gift for them. It is said na kapag pumayag ang babae dito, ibig sabihin ay may tiwala at pagmamahal sila for their partner.
3) As a form of dominance. For some men, anal sex can be an act of dominance, kaya mas arousing para sa kanila. This can mean na ibinibigay mo sa kanila ang buong katawan mo, even your anus. Hence, mas nararamdaman nila ang kanilang “pagkalalaki.”
4) As an indicator that the woman is adventurous. May mga studies na nagsasabi that women who engage in anal sex are more adventurous, more sensual, and more comfortable in their sexuality. Kung baga, hindi sila nahihiya when it comes to sex, kaya mas liberating ang experience.
5) It feels different. To answer your other question, para sa ibang lalaki, mas gusto nila ang feeling ng anal sex dahil mas “masikip” para sa kanila ang anal canal kaysa sa vaginal canal kaya mas madami silang nararamdaman through anal sex than vaginal sex.
If you feel that you really do not like engaging in anal sex, mas mabuting maivoice out mo ito sa asawa mo para magawan niyo ito ng paraan. Puwede kayong maghanap ng iba pang mga gagawin in sex para magkaroon siya ng different experience that can be pleasurable for the both of you.
Kung gusto mo naman itong i-try ulit, make sure that you are relaxed, comfortable, and fully aroused para hindi magcocontract ang iyong anus, and use a lot of lube! Good luck!
With love and lust,
Rica
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If you have questions on love and sex that you want me to answer, you may message me at www.facebook.com/TheSexyMind.
Biography: Rica Cruz is a Licensed Psychologist, Marriage Counselor, and, Couples and Sex Therapist. She comes out as the Resident Psychologist on Boys’ Night Out every Thursday night on Magic 89.9.
